Chapter 36: Beautifully Regular

Now more than ever you will hear and see, particularly within the black community, the mention of being “Kings and Queens”. This is to say we are recovering from the void of knowledge of a destroyed history in which we were royalty, regal, majestic and honorable. This recovery is further accentuated in cases by some of those who choose to wear their hair natural, in dreads, locs, knots, afro, puffs, twist etc., as a “crown”. (Being bald….well….I am literally not feeling this.) The 2nd runner up for 2017 Ms. Universe, Ms. Jamaica Davina Bennett, looked exactly like that regal image:


( she was robbed, watch her final answer on YouTube).

As a black man, I am at least generally aware of the history and the struggles of the black man the world over, particularly in America. I dare not say acutely aware as there is so much history to learn and so much still being discovered. The short of it, is the deliberate separation and orphaning of the black man from his history and heritage by oppressing, colonizing entities resulted in a separation and a forced ignorance of our lineages. So it could be true to say that perhaps in my family line and many other lines, if we had the ability to trace back to pre-colonial Africa, quite of few of us would discover that we were indeed Kings and Queens. Now, in our perpetual struggle for equal opportunity (which is challenged by those outside of the experience for reasons wholly unacceptable) we are embracing our roots and are looking to speak positively to the next person who shares our struggle.

This is good. Much better than the alternative which is to call someone my N***** (read this opinion post first)

But….this presents a new challenge, one I would like to discuss: Are we all truly Kings and Queens?

Kings and Queens are rulers of a realm. They are not the same as elected public servants, they are served in order to serve. They do not have to win the hearts and minds of the people to earn their position. They are groomed from birth to look, be and sound like that which is defined as regal. Royalty is of a family line, not of election. This is to say that while I can be elected the President of the United States, I can never be elected the King of another country. Like Meghan Markle, the potential to marry into royalty may exist but only by invitation and assimilation, not by election or campaign. This is not to say that once in power that they do not bear a responsibility to the people or share a compassionate vision for them.

T’Challa in Black Panther had no choice in the matter in wanting to be King, the only real choice he had was what kind of a King he wanted to be. The advice he received from his father in a vision:

“You are a good man, with a good heart, and it is hard for a good man to be king.” – T’Chaka – from the motion picture Black Panther (my favorite line in the entire film)

Being royal is traditionally hereditary and essentially automatic based solely on bloodline. Being a person of quality, being that “good man” is the result of when years of development coincide with those moments in life that are inconvenient, moments where the option to NOT be of quality is present and the choice is made to be quality regardless.

Our default as people is to desire the wrong things, the elicit foods and lusts, sex and decadence, greed and power, dominance and control of others. We see it with our babies, they learn anger and greed and territorial tendencies with no instruction. Yet they have to be taught, reminded and reinforced in years long lessons the simple things such as “thank you” and sharing. We have a fallen nature which has to be combated against in order to maintain decency. My style of combat is faith in Jesus Christ. I am informed by a living breathing Lord and Savior that what I do now has ramifications for generations in both direction and plays out once this life is over. Jesus, had the distinction of being Lord, King and Savior but yet rarely referred to Himself as such. He was, however, beautifully regular it was his quiet power that screamed out and captured the hearts of people and still does today.

In our quest to be Kings and Queens we have to understand that that is secondary to who we are as people. As long as you live and breathe, if you are in line for a throne, will get that throne, but, the heart that you take is the heart that you rule with. Power amplifies that which already exists. The speaker system does not make the music, it makes louder and clearer the music that is being input into it. If the music is trash in content or quality of engineering or performance you will find out upon playback. The more powerful the system it is plugged into, the more apparent the mistakes are and while these mistakes can be addressed in post-production and hidden in a dynamic, pyrotechnic show they still exist. This is why some “performers” avoid morning talk shows where they might be asked to perform live as they will have nothing to hide behind.

So if you fancy yourself to be a King/Queen, what is in your heart? Is it a good heart? Are you striving to be better and do better? The Bible speaks of many Kings who did evil in the sight of the Lord so the entire nation suffered, the responsibility is that high. The thought of being a beautifully regular person with a beautifully irregular responsibility should have its mainstay in the thought patterns of every leader. It would help to keep humility and compassion guarding the gates of decision making.

Second major point is if we are all Kings/Queens who are the peasants? Peasants are the soul of a kingdom, these are the regular people who understand that they are not royalty in name or title but still are people of ambition, substance and quality. We all cannot rule. Some of us, most of us, simply live and desire to do so in peace.

We can and should find moments where we do indeed rule. Everyone has a platform and a place of leadership but that place is not all places and all times. Truth be told, true leadership is a particular type of stress that not everyone can handle. Mom, yes you are a Queen, Dad yes you are a King, joint rule in your home, in your family raise princes and princesses full of love, confidence and identity. You possess the ability to raise those babies in a way no one else can do you raise then from title or from heart?

Maybe beyind your home you extend your influence in your neighborhood or in your school’s PTA but perhaps that is where it stops for you. That is great, own your sphere of influence. Your next door neighbor might be a volunteer firefighter, serve on a town board. The next might coach local sports, and one might look to be a local legislature while another a local judge. The next might be a candidate for County, State or National Congress? Who knows? Find it, get it and rule it with a good heart but don’t neglect your other responsibilities or believe that your kingdom is absolute or that you are all things to all people.


Because the next kingdom might feel the same and history also shows that striving kingdoms have a very nasty tendency to fight each other.

We speak of #slay and #slayage and such, please continue to look dope while doing dope things with dope people but be wary of that ugly head of competitiveness. Superficial beauty can hide ugly things and being grown has nothing to do with body, bank account or square footage of your home. You slay dragons and demons not your contemporaries and definitely not your ancestors. Let that slay be from a good heart and a healthy mind so that when you first touch something it is for the betterment and somewhere down the list also for IG photos (but look good, maybe your future spouse is liking those pics)

Being beautifully regular in all that you do or are is the late Barbara Bush who in reflection of her passing was said to have been the person whom you can feel the warmth come off of. This is true of her in life before the White House, as First Lady and in memorial of.

Lastly, in respect to the Word, by being beautifully regular, you and I, like David can become a King. It was his quiet quality that was his fingerprint from the field to the throne room. He was a literal King by God’s call and despite his mistakes never lost sight of the responsibilities of his throne. He never lost sight that his goal was never to be King but to be a beautifully regular in the sight of God.

To quote another movie Thor 2:

“I’d rather be a good man than a great king.” – Thor, son of Odin


  1. Beautifully regular. That is something to think about and can be subjective.

    I refer to my mother as a Queen. I know some of her story, struggles, etc. She does what she does and does her best without any spotlight. Her heart is what makes her royalty. In a way, there is a movement away from doing your best without the shine to let no one see you as regular. You must always be on and popping. Face beat just going to check the mail, waist tight (via exercise, waist trainer, plastic surgery, corset) and everything else. (This more applies to women.) This seems to be today’s Beautifully Regular, whether or not a person is a believer in Christ. I can’t imagine IG being about regular. That’s why it’s not for everybody–definitely not for me. LOL

    Royalty used to be seen in person in how a person carried themselves, how they treated their families, how they conduct themselves at work…all without fixed poses and airbrushing and likes. Just plain old word of mouth. What happened to that?


    1. I think ideally it is starting to make a comeback. Unfortunately things now are more superficial trends and fads devoid of context aka root so they bloom fast and burn fast.


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